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By Better Days Global, Aug 17 2018 12:09PM



What if other people could see beyond your physical appearance and look at your insecurities, pride, shame, or malicious thoughts?


Those are the kinds of things our society urges you to cover up. After a while, you create masks to hide your true thoughts and feelings and present an image you hope will prove your worth. The longer you wear your masks, the more comfortable they feel. But you cannot enjoy healthy relationships unless you remove the masks and show others who you really are. Here’s how you can take off the masks you present to the world and be authentic:


Realize the price of the masks you wear.






Understand that your masks prevent you from experiencing real life. Your masks give you a distorted view of what is really happening in your life and people begin to view not you, but the masks you wear. Instead of living for other people’s approval and praise, live to please God alone no matter what others think of you. Shift your focus from establishing your identity on earth to something much more meaningful. Understand that your mask prevents you from experiencing intimacy in relationships. Rather than trying to prove your value to other people, seek to simply connect with them.



Ask Questions



Don’t be afraid to honestly ask yourself deep questions about your existence, worth, emotions, thoughts, and purpose. Stop living according to the status quo and consider what changes you need to make to become more authentic. Too often we follow trends, formulas, and ways of living because we do not believe we are enough. Give yourself time to step into the core of who you are and allow your blessings to come to you. When you model your life, personality, or business after something that is outside of you, you block your own potential. When you stay true to who you are, you’ll be in your own unique and authentic lane. Trade lies for the truth about yourself. Instead of just trying to feel good about yourself, let the awareness of your brokenness lead you to the wholeness awaiting you. Find real confidence, not the temporary feel good fix. Rather than basing your confidence on how smart, beautiful, successful, talented, or charming you are, base it on your true authentic self. Stop pretending to be someone you’re not to try to feel more confident; pretending will only lead to deeper insecurity. Accept the truth about yourself, tell the truth, and live in that truth. Then your life will catch up.



Let go of your concerns about how other people make you feel. Don’t worry about being affirmed, being right, demanding respect, judging others, keeping score, harboring bitterness, competing, gossiping, or bickering. Be more interested in genuinely connecting with others rather than impressing them or saving face. Speak the truth in all your relationships. Admit your mistakes and ask for forgiveness. Do your work well. Don’t disengage with your work, viewing it just as a job that you have to do, but don’t really want to do well. Don’t be so driven that you try to prove your worth by working hard. Instead, do whatever work you do, from cleaning, or answering phones to inventing a product or speaking to crowds, with your very best effort, remembering that absolutely everything you do has eternal consequences. Look at every task you undertake as an opportunity to serve God through your attitude. Instead of working just for a paycheck, fame, or praise from other people, work to honour God. Ask yourself: Am I Authentic? Start from there.



There are levels to living authentically.


This is not how your story ends;


Written By Steve Whyte



By Better Days Global, Aug 17 2018 11:55AM



It can be easy to become influenced by voices that don’t get what you’re trying to do. People who don’t approve of you or your work, will always try to discourage you. Once you make your mark, you’ll attract erasers. People who are intimidated by your prime will always try to shorten it. Maybe there are people who drain your energy by constantly demanding you to justify the choices you make, to explain yourself to them so that they can argue with you. By all means spend some time explaining your why, but don’t lose sleep over the fact that they don’t listen and don’t approve of it. Whatever you do, don’t change the way you’re doing it because of them. They don’t really care and they don’t matter to the work you are doing. They provide an excuse to quit. Don’t let it be that. Don’t let the desire to have your work approved drive the work itself. If that was what drove the greatest minds in history, the world would look very different and we would probably still be living in caves, or extinct. Do you approve of yourself or do you seek the approval of others?






When we lack confidence and in particular have a low understanding of our worth, we find ourselves needing the approval of others to feel good about ourselves. Unfortunately, in this day and age of being over worked and under valued, the approval of others may take years to come or never will. Saying “well done” or “thank you” doesn’t seem too common in language in modern society, and how often do you say such things to others?



Being self critical is an easy habit to get into, and forms the basis of our needing approval from others. The root of our self-criticism is usually being at the receiving end of criticism from others as we grow up. I like the expression that “criticism is negative feedback badly delivered”.


Constantly receiving messages like “you’re too slow/stupid/bad/ugly/…” etc leads to us believing that this is a reality. And language like “don’t do that” “why did you….” “you shouldn’t have” “you always” “you mustn’t” doesn’t exactly help a child feel good about themselves. Every expression is a sign of disapproval, so it’s not surprising we grow wanting that approval from others. Comparing ourselves to others is another way we end up being critical of ourselves, as we usually find ways we don’t match up. This perpetuates our own self-disapproval. If you must compare, find positive things in the process and use your comparison to grow not to shrink yourself. Even if you find yourself with role models you are trying to emulate, there will be aspects of their personality, perhaps particular skills or attributes that you already have but they don’t possess. We all have a special fingerprint and God carefully made us all unique for a reason.



Identify situations where you find yourself seeking the approval of others. Is it with particular people, boss, parent, in particular environments, workplace, home, social? Is there any reason you can identify why this should be, why you’re leaving yourself vulnerable to their moods and frustrations? Whether or not you can find reasons for your seeking approval, start getting in the habit of getting approval solely God and from yourself. One easy way to challenge such thinking, is to remind yourself that most people are quite self centered and will speak from their own perspective and opinion of who you should be based on their own beliefs. The problem with this perspective is that they have completely travelled a different path to you, which led them to this train of thought process which doesn’t make it 100% accurate to your situation or even the truth. It is flawed. In the same way you spend most of your time full of self talk, worrying about you, other people are not as concerned about you as you think. They’re mostly concerned about themselves.






The bottom line is while you’re worried about others opinion or approval of you, they probably haven’t given you any thought at all. Like you, when they’re thinking about other people, it’s mainly in relation to themselves. None of us know what anyone else is thinking. Whether or not they’ve even noticed you or what you have done, you may never know. So why beat yourself up about it?



Seeking approval of others and listening to the opinions that don’t resonate with you is detrimental to your happiness. People who ignore their own identity and instead choose to act on the preference of other people never find their true calling or purpose in life. They become the puppets of this lifetime in control by whomever they hand the strings to. This happens because other people do not know your deepest needs and desires, so they cannot help you find your life’s purpose. Almost everyone seeks approval of others on some level, mainly because we were trained to do so since our childhood. That’s what all educational systems and many other institutions and traditions teach us.



If we behave well, our parents are happy with us. If we do what our teachers tell us to do, we are rewarded with good grades. If at work we do our best, the managers are happy with us. Everything seems to be based on the obedience model and bound to someone else. So when there is no defined model to follow, it seems like something is missing. And we automatically start seeking approval to check if we are doing everything okay. We find gurus and other intelligent people and seek their approval. But you should realize that sometimes you’ll have to create a path instead of following someone else’s. If every decision you make is based of another person’s ‘yes’, you will lose your own sense of direction in life and end up on their path unequipped. If you blindly follow others, you will not be happy. Sometimes you will have to be the first that ever did it. If you firstly try to consciously disregard such critics, it will be hard, but with time, it will be increasingly easier to not care what others think about your choices when you completely free yourself from the approval-seeking mode. 



This is not how your story ends;


Written By Steve Whyte




By Better Days Global, Apr 12 2018 10:37AM



In this age of goals, dreams and aspirations, it is no secret that troubles come along the way. For some it may seem that they come more often than success or achievement. In these moments, it is difficult to see the light in the tunnel, and this causes many to lose hope and the spark they once had. The constant pursuit of something that is in the world, but not in your life can become draining, and the yearning it creates for a shift is deep, powerful but often painful.



We have thoughts of doubt, which are tied to desperation of a big break, a change, and a next level. This quest and desire for a breakthrough isn’t a bad thing, however, can become dangerous if the things we seek are limited by faulty interpretations of what the shift is. It is easy to subscribe to the notion that success, security and wellness are things, which are dependent on external and tangible acquisitions. These beliefs are driven by how these blessings are often portrayed, but limited by our perspective and attachments to our own domino effect scenarios. We adopt the viewpoints that if we do this, this and then this, we will get to this level, or achieve this thing that will lead to this opportunity, which will lead to this person seeing us, and then we will arrive, or we think if we get this amount of money, we can do this thing, and go to this place, which will make us happy.






I’m here today to tell you that anything that is outside of you is limited to its existence, without longevity and subject to change. If all of your dreams and goals are dependent on the current of the external world, and the array of variables that can exist, your shift and next level will always be limited but larger than you. However, when you set your mind in a higher place and submit to the reality that God has blessed you abundantly, you will soon see that your shift is not outside of you, rather inside of you. You’ll come to understand and utilise the powerful reality that anything that can fit inside of your mind is smaller than you.






I came to this realisation one year in Paris, standing beneath the Eifel Tower. It was my first time visiting Paris and I was amazed at the size of the Tower. It was much larger than I had previously thought. So big that I struggled to properly frame its full form in my camera lens. As I tried my best to fit it in, it then dawned upon me that the camera lens I had attached wasn’t the correct lens to use from the perspective I were standing, and I had to settle for a mental image. I immediately was mind-blown as something so small triggered such a deep and profound revelation within me: If it can fit inside of my mind, it’s smaller than me. This day changed my perspective of what everything meant to me, large problems began to shrink, my vision expanded and I for the first time saw the unlimited nature and abilities of my own mind. It is a universe within itself, created by God which contains unlimited blessings.



Once I had this reality grasped, nothing seemed to big, too far away, or too out of reach, as I now knew that my big break, shift and next level was a mindset. My advice to you today is to stop looking around you for what is already within you. The internal drives the external. Go beyond your understanding and all that you’ve experienced. God has so much more for you to see, and it is way bigger than any promotion, amount of money, or perspective of reality that you or I could draw up from our viewpoint of the world.



You are your shift.



This is not how your story ends;



Written By Steve Whyte




By Better Days Global, Mar 28 2018 09:49AM


You don’t have to look too far to see someone selling the ‘secrets to success’, or feeling as if you’re lacking in life because you don’t have what they are selling. I wouldn’t blame you for thinking that success is a place that you get to, or that it’s by getting a certain amount of something, whether fame, money or to the top of the ladder. You have been bombarded with a plethora of images throughout your life that tells you that success is what you do, rather than who you are. For this reason we spend our lives doing and not being,



Over the year my views on success have changed dramatically. I went from wanting it all, to being content with what I have. I realised that external things like money, impact, popularity and respect come as a by-product of doing what is in your heart. No amount of money, status or credibility will substitute for a heart that deprived of substance and joy. If you do not enjoy what you do, the results and rewards will be tarnished. This doesn’t mean that you cannot be successful in the little things. When you switch you frequency of happiness from results, to process, you’ll be able to resonate with small successes along the way. Sure, it is good to have long-term goals, but, if all of your self love, joy and appreciation are tied to the fulfilment of those goals, you’ll miss out on many successes right in front of you along the way.






When I were younger I wrote a lot of goals, and I thought that success was in achieving them. Once I achieved them I still felt unaccomplished. This taught me a very important lesson. We never arrive. The finish line is always moving and therefore, we run not one race, but many races along the way. Now I am focused on one race at a time, ensuring I’m prepared, focused and appreciative for each stride I take. This starts when I first wake up in the morning. I pray and give thanks for the new air in my lungs: success number 1, I appreciate life: success number 2 and I ensure that I keep that energy of gratitude within all of my actions to follow. This type of success impacts family, friends, business and self.


By paying closer attention to the detail of life, we become human beings and not human doings. We open ourselves up to the joys that God has placed in our lives, and we are receptive to the obvious things we previously overlooked. This type of awareness brings about a change in how we interpret the things that happen within our lives, and wisdom is deposited within our spirits. We feel a sense of purpose behind our actions not matter how small, we connect with likeminded individuals who were waiting for you to wake up and tap into divinity, and we see success in failure, disappointment and misfortune.






I don’t know what success means to you today, as that is personal, but I do know that God has a purpose for you life. I encourage you to be still, pray, meditate, and tune into His realm. Seek and you will find. Do not just subscribe to the tangible and limited perspectives of success forced down your throat.


The truth about success is: it’s not seen, its felt.


This is not how your story ends;

By Better Days Global, Mar 17 2018 12:37PM


Allow me to get straight to the point. You can set as many clear and concise goals you so choose. You can write them in attractive notebooks and fancy them up with highlighters for that added extra. But unless you’re clear as to what will motivate you to actually make those goals happen. You will not move forward. End of story. I read so many personal development books that tell you that one of the key ways to become successful in whatever your chosen field may be is to be decisive and clear in your goals and your overall objective. Of course, this is in many ways accurate, but behind this has to be the intention to be committed to lifting these goals off of the page, and this can only happen if you are completely aware of what will drive you and empower you to make them happen, no matter what, regardless of the sacrifice.





Let me give you an example. I’m driven by the act of proving people wrong. You may think this is toxic or not the best way to get yourself up in the morning. However, I beg to differ. I have spent my entire life breaking conventions and the apparent status quo. I was the product of a single teenaged parent who gave birth to me at 17. Apparently or statistically, I too was supposed to follow a similar path. Well I didn’t, go figure. I guess I just wasn’t keen on being a stat, perhaps I wanted to put two pretty manicured fingers up at the establishment because it gave me a buzz and fed the desire I now hold within me to continually challenge the naysayers and walk to the beat of my own drum. This way of being has seen me well because believe me, there have been more than enough instances in my life where I had every reason to give up, throw down the gauntlet, and call it quits. After all, I had exhausted every option I had given to me and I really didn’t see the point. However, that passing moment was just that, a moment because I reminded myself of all the individuals who would want me to give up and just go back to living unsatisfied and below my own expectations.





Once again, imagining how much this would make others happy helped me to push negativity aside and get back on my path. So now I hope you get it. I established early on what would drive and motivate me to not give up and to keep chasing my goals, no matter the setback and now I encourage you to be clear in your understanding of what you turn to, to get back up and back into this race we call life.



The best way to establish this is to write down all the things that excite and empower you. It may be exercising, it may be listening to music, or reading a motivational book. Or, it could be writing down all the things you’re grateful for and revisiting the list to remind yourself of your blessings. Whatever it is, seek it and be clear in it. Once you’re able to do this, you can then commit yourself to your goals and working wholeheartedly towards making them a reality.



In-spire LS | www.in-spirelsmagazine.co.uk





By Better Days Global, Mar 7 2018 11:06AM




There is a feature of a Woman that is underrated; “her hands”. They reach out to those outside of her home in service. No matter where you are right now, I want you to look down and examine your hands. Are they young or old? Soft or calloused? Sun spotted? Do your veins show? Do you think your hands are beautiful? Often your hands are one of the first places to show your age – they have worked hard serving your Husbands, children, and the needy. What a blessing it is to have two hands! Do not be discouraged as you toil day in and day out for loved ones within and outside your home. When you use your hands for God’s Glory, He is pleased. Look down and examine your hands, a second time. Do you have a new perspective? Do not judge the beauty of your hands by the outside – but rather by lives they have touched.




Man was made from the soil, Woman from bones. After God made man, He gave him the breath of life. But with Woman He didn’t because she was made with life already in her. The Man was seen to be alone until the Woman was created. The Woman was created with a womb; the divine ability to create and nurture life; ensuring the continuity of the human existence. God made you uniquely who you are on purpose! There is something very special about being a Woman. There is strength in your femininity, and you don’t need to exchange that strength to gain opportunity, acceptance, or promotion. There is more to you as a Woman than what meets the eye and you have a unique fingerprint, ability and a divine purpose. Don’t sell yourself cheap to any Man or let a boy of a Man abuse and disrespect you. You have the right to be loved, respected and appreciated.






You are more than the sex symbol the world has made you. You are more than the beautiful face or the sculptured body. You are far more than your clothes size or makeup collection. You have been created to be unique. Blessed is the Woman who knows her worth and the Man who never lets her forget it. The term submission is not to define a position of weakness or to highlight that your life must be that of perpetual servitude. But that the Man needs you as you need him. You are suitable, well adapted and complementary. There are strengths you possess that the Man would need and possibly depend on.



I must say that there are Men that will never live a fulfilled life in this world until they have located the unique fingerprint of a real Women.



Excerpt taken from #TheLoveManual by Steve Whyte





By Better Days Global, Feb 27 2018 09:44PM


I have always looked for the best in people. So much that I chose from very young age to tune out scepticism, doubters and those who failed to believe. This on the surface may seem like a great quality to have, as many struggle with this very task. However, as the years went by, I started to notice that although it is good to look for the best in people, I shouldn’t live in a place of denial especially when it comes to my dreams and what people really think and feel about them.






Part of my growth has been in me identifying, and being aware of the destructive energies that have the power to corrupt and destroy my dream, by putting their shadowed hand into the soil of my vision. They come subtly, often disguised as advice, yet they carry deep and dark motives, and are attached with ruthless agendas. Sadly they often come from ‘Friends’ and ‘Family members, who fail to see our vision. Some cannot grasp who you have grown into, and others are jealous of your evolution. Their arrows of pessimism quench the soul out of your passions, dreams and advancements, oftentimes in attempt to hold you captive, hostage to your lower self. It is important to know that not everybody in your life is good for your dream. Not everyone in your circle is in your corner. You must identify the weeds who wait to choke your stem with aim to prevent you from bringing forth any fruit.






Awareness is only one stage. You must stay rooted in and out of season to ensure that you are strong enough to withstand the draining forces from outside and around you. Their masks cover up their shame as they aim to steal, kill and destroy your victory. Your hope, faith and commitment shouldn’t be an outside job, or be dependent on any external approval or acceptance. When God plants a vision within you, stay committed to it, pursue it with boldness and protect it from dream killers. I often say that if you don’t live from the praises of people, you wont die from the criticism of people, but what I may begin to add is that, not all praise is good and not all criticism is bad. You must be secure and sure enough in your vision to carry it out regardless of the results or the popularity of it. Do not be oblivious to the naysayers, do not ignore them; rather use it all as fuel and a spotlight on your belief. Do you need to believe more? Are you rooted deep enough? What adjustments need to be made? Am I forcing squares into my circle? These questions only lead to action. Action is the force that makes things happen.


Be of good courage, God is on your side, this is not how your story ends;


Written by Steve Whyte




By Better Days Global, Feb 14 2018 08:48PM




Many children in school each year before Valentine’s Day bring in an empty shoebox. They cover those boxes with pink and red papers and heart shaped cut-outs, and then add their names in big, sparkly letters. When Valentine’s Day arrives, classmates drop cards into a slit cut out at the top of the box. When they get home, they count their cards to see how many friends they have — it is a childish way to measure their worth. But we as adults do the same.



These days, we don’t need shoebox Valentines for that, we have social media. Based on the number of likes, follows, retweets, and pins, we can tally up how many “friends” we have, still boiling things down to numbers. We keep record of how much we are loved based on how others treat us. Our relationships are based on quid pro quo — scratching backs and procuring favors. “What have you done for me lately?” is the theme song that defines too many relationships. We only give as much as someone else has given to us. We like to keep the scales balanced. Not only that, but our memories are long. We never lose track of what we are owed.




Real Love Cannot Be Measured



I once found a book on numbers for my kids to read. It listed the names of numbers higher than billions and trillions. Now when they want to exaggerate and say that something is so big, bigger than they can count, they say “googolplex.” Yet even a number that high is still quantifiable.



Real love isn’t something you can measure. Tweet Share on Facebook



But real love isn’t something you can measure. The love God has for us is beyond numbers and can’t be tallied. When God promised to bless Abraham with countless children, he used the stars in the sky and the sand on the seashore as a metaphor. These are things people simply cannot count. Paul described the love of Christ as surpassing knowledge (Ephesians 3:19). And the psalmist wrote, “Your steadfast love, O LORD, extends to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds” (Psalm 36:5). God’s love for us goes farther than even time itself, into the deep recesses of eternity past. It stretched all the way from forever, forward to the cross, and will continue into eternity future. “He chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ” (Ephesians 1:4–5). His love for us is a love that doesn’t hold back. His love gives everything, to the point of sacrificing his very own Son. At the cross, the perfect eternal love of the triune God was shown most vividly as the Son bore all our sins for us. This is unquantifiable, immeasurable love. God’s love for us is a love that doesn’t hold back. His love gives everything. Tweet Share on Facebook Unlike many human relationships, we can’t add to God’s love for us. We can’t do anything to make him “unfriend” us. His love for us is perfect and complete. It is not based on what we can do for him or what we have to offer. It can’t be that way simply because he has no needs that we could ever meet. His love originates in himself and not in anything we have done or will do. This unconditional love is the love he set on Israel and it is the same love he has for us. “It was not because you were more in number than any other people that the Lord set his love on you and chose you, for you were the fewest of all peoples, but it is because the Lord loves you” (Deuteronomy 7:7–8).







Our Love for Others



In our own flesh, our love for others would always be conditional and dependent on how others treat us. But because God has poured out his immeasurable, unquantifiable love for us through Christ, we have been changed. Our hearts of stone have been transformed to hearts of flesh (Ezekiel 36:26). We’ve been given the Spirit who now lives within us. As the Spirit works in us, making us more like Jesus, he enables us to love in a new and different way. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness” (Galatians 5:22). Through the work of the Spirit, we can give without expecting anything in return. We can be patient, kind, and compassionate. We can love as Jesus loves.


But there is an order to this love that we cannot forget. It originates with God. He is the beginning and source to our love. First John 4:19 says, “We love because he first loved us.” We cannot truly love apart from him. Only as we abide in God’s love can we extend his love to others.


Only as we abide in God’s love can we extend his love to others. Tweet Share on Facebook

So this Valentine’s Day, as the world keeps a tally of love, may we never forget that God’s love for us is greater than anything we can imagine. It is greater than googolplex and more than the stars in the sky. It is immeasurable, steadfast, and permanent. And that same amazing love has been given to us to extend it to others. May we give that love, without keeping score, knowing that God’s love for us keeps no record, because in Jesus, our debts have been marked: “paid in full.”





By Better Days Global, Jan 24 2018 07:46PM



Tell someone struggling with money worries, or trying to make the best of an unfulfilling relationship, that gratitude is the key to happiness and they will probably turn away in disgust. But gratitude does not mean pretending to be happy. Practising gratitude simply means cultivating a new perspective, one that may increase your joy and pleasure in life and is most powerful when we give thanks to God for life.



The Nature of Gratitude



Real gratitude: it means taking the time to enjoy what you already have.



In a paper on the subject, the psychologists Robert Emmons and Robin Stern describe gratitude in both a worldly and transcendent sense. In its worldy sense, it is the feeling we experience when someone performs a kind or thoughtful act, usually without us asking for or expecting it. For many, it is also a sign of depth, sensitivity, and good manners.



But gratitude can be understood in a more general or "transcendent" sense as well, as an antidote to the toxic delusion that we are entitled to be happy. Indeed, the American Declaration of Independence enshrines the right to "pursue" such happiness, implying that it is not only attainable but a right. Therapists often struggle to persuade clients that they are in fact entitled to nothing, that life isn't fair and that no one ever gets everything they want. These seem obvious points, but to many they are not. The British comedy series Peep Show, for example, includes a monstrous character who exhibits precisely this sort of thinking: a selfish, lazy, 30-something who even says at one point "why can't I have everything I want all the time...I mean, that's democracy, isn't it?" Obviously, the character is meant to be stupid as well as comical, but he does express a very common attitude.



Gratitude in its transcendent sense is an antidote to this. No doubt some will object and argue that this is just another way of saying "aim low," adding that unless you have big dreams and ambitions you will achieve nothing. But cultivating gratitude does not mean giving up your ambitions. It just means recognizing that the universe owes you nothing and that you should take the time to appreciate what you have. After all, when we roamed the African savannah two or three million years ago you'd be fortunate to reach your mid-30s!






Gratitude and Modern Life



Human beings are very good at noticing the bad things in life. Indeed, most people have worked, or even lived, with someone who constantly drew attention to the rain, the heat, the traffic etc. Of course, the news does much the same (indeed, it would be more accurate to describe it as "the bad news," given that that is what it largely consists of). Some explain this through evolutionary psychology. To put it crudely, those who sat admiring the clouds and feeling grateful to be alive would have fared poorly. Those who focussed on the practical and paid attention to potential threats (a rival tribe's plan to attack or a leopard prowling the neighboring valley etc) would have survived longer.



In a consumer society, gratitude and contentment are also bad for business. It is in the interests of those who employ workers and make and sell the TVs, clothes, computers, cars, and jewellery, to keep people restless and dissatisfied. If everyone was grateful for what they had, they wouldn't strive for more – and striving for more keeps the economy ticking over; it motivates people to work hard and then spend their cash on shiny new goods. The German philosopher Herbert Marcuse wrote an interesting book on this subject titled One Dimensional Man: the Ideology of Advanced Industrial Society, in which he argued that developed nations create "false needs" via mass media and advertising, resulting in "one-dimensional" personalities.



And this sense of discontent is exacerbated by social media, with its endless images of old school friends standing before a new house or car. Thus, our jealousy, and the fear of being left behind, which have always existed of course, can now be inflamed as you lie in bed at night flicking through your iPhone. After all, it is difficult to feel gratitude when the girl who bullied you in High School puts up photos of her new sports car or beachfront home on Facebook, while here you are struggling to pay the rent on your rotten little apartment!






Strengthening Relationships


Gratitude has numerous benefits, not least in relationships. First, a distinction needs to be made between gratitude in the abstract or "transcendent" sense and gratitude in its less healthy, slavish sense. Many people, especially those with poor self-esteem, consider themselves lucky to be with their partner. Because of this, they adopt a passive, docile attitude: eager to please, quick to give way in arguments, and so on. When friends or loved ones comment on this and urge them to stand up for themselves, they reply "yes, but I'm just grateful to have her. I'm so lucky – she is out of my league." Unfortunately, this kind of gratitude is a huge turnoff.



The gratitude that strengthens relationships does not involve meekly accepting everything your partner does. However, those who approach the world with a sense of gratitude, who are simply grateful to be alive, are easier to live with. Since gratitude lifts you out of yourself, it also makes you less self-centred and less narcissistic. And such people are also quick to forgive. More generally, they exude a sense of lightness and joy. If you have ever met a cancer survivor, you may understand what is meant by that. Such people often find all their old ambitions and resentments melt away and that they are just grateful to exist.






Wonder and Joy



Happiness is gratitude doubled by wonder. Many long-term meditators, for example, speak of such gratitude. And this may be in part because meditation shifts one's consciousness. In day to day life, most people spend an enormous amount of time lost in thought, usually about the past or the future. Meditation teaches you to detach yourself from these thoughts, to become a witness to them, to observe them as if from the outside.



It is this thought that keeps us trapped in time. And people tend not to look backward or forward with gratitude but with regret and fear. Instead, the meditator seeks to live in what the Buddhists call an "Eternal Now." Those who experiment with mind-expanding drugs, for example, try to induce this state artificially. Aldous Huxley even wrote of the "tears of gratitude" experienced when a drug like mescaline shatters the identification with thought and returns people to the present. When this happens, life here and now suddenly appears charged with meaning and significance and is experienced with a new intensity, wonder, and joy.



Practising Gratitude



You could start by compiling a gratitude list. Write down all the things you have to be grateful for, no matter how trivial or mundane they seem. And be as specific as possible. Next to each item, include the reason for your gratitude. You could even try compiling such lists at the end of each day. So, for example, you could note that the train arrived on time or that you managed to get a seat by the window. And note the gratitude you feel towards others for their simple acts of kindness. The more you do this, the more it becomes a habit. If you find it truly helpful, you could even start a gratitude blog or ask others to join you on a social media account.



Above all, be sincere. Few people are quite so irritating as those addicted to New Age therapy, who spend their time inanely grinning and trying to convince themselves that they feel happy when they do not. And remember, you have more choice in how you feel that you realize. You can choose to approach life in any way you like. A sense of gratitude would be a good place to start.



By Better Days Global, Jan 16 2018 05:36PM


I pride myself on projecting an image to the world that is authentic and true of my character through my interactions with my audience via my social media platforms Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. This also can be said of the social media accounts for my magazine In-spire LS. We currently live in a world where numbers rule and it does not always matter how talented, educated or passionate you are about your work; interest is far greater when your followers are in the double figures. Of course, there are now more than ever a number of quick fix -it schemes that I could employ to raise my game in this area. However, nothing is more important to me than to show my journey, the ups and the downs, the successes and the failures, the highs and the lows, the moments of uncertainty and self-doubt and the times when I feel like I can take on the world; and win. Because I want you to know that you can experience the very same, share it with the world without fear of rejection or superiority and still reach the levels of success you dream of.




I want you all to know that I hustle and I grind all day, every day. There are no rest days and there are no days off. Then, I return home and in any spare second, I can get my hands on; I am pursuing my passion writing. Whatever your passion may be, you should be dedicated to doing the same. No matter what. No quick fixes, no faking it for the gram. Just pure dedication and truth in the parts of your journey that you share. Sharing content like the type I put out on In-spire LS and spreading a positive message is what I LIVE for. My passion encapsulates me. It is the first thing I think on upon waking and the last thing I think about before going to sleep.



As my mind remains focused on what I am building and the message I want to convey. I cannot be caught up in what the next person is doing. I cannot allow myself to look around at others and compare what I have to them because that would be selling my vision, my dream; and myself short. I cannot allow myself to convey a life to those who follow me that is not true, that is false and constructed to raise my game because that would not be right. Of course, I have had many a naysayer comment on the decisions I have made in the growth of my brand. There’re those who have believed that they could and would do a better job than I have or attained a higher level of success than I have managed to attain in the time I have pursued this venture; had the dream been placed in their heart.



However, it was not placed within their heart, it was given to me and your dream has been given to you. It may take you 5 months, 5 years, 15 years to reach the levels of success you aspire to but on this path never ever compromise on your authenticity and what makes you intrinsically you.





You will reach the level of success you require but in the process, never lose sight of who you are what you stand for and the steps you have taken to get you from where you are to where you want to be. Your journey to success will be that more rewarding and the respect you receive will be that more greater if you stay true to who you are and the journey you have taken to get there.




#LiveWell